1. Hide in an aisle with a perfume tester. When an unsuspecting victim walks around the corner, spray them in the face with it. Then run like hell.
2. Learn to disco dance. Do it in the corridors. Follow people while dancing.
3. Walk up to someone, say "Hello, it's nice to meet you. My name's Injun." Proceed to lick your hand and wipe it on their face. Smile and walk away.
4. Hide in a clothing rack and jump on random people.
5. Wear fairy wings and a tiara. Run through a store screaming "The portal closes in 16 minutes! Sheri! We have to find it!"
6. Choose a random customer in the store. Follow her/him, staying about 10-15 feet behind them. Every time they stop, you stop. But try to look like you're trying (unsuccessfully) to be inconspicuous. Do this until he/she pays for their things. Then eye them suspiciously and walk away.
7. Drag a friend to a "secluded" spot. Make loud sex noises.
8. Walk straight up to someone, put your fingers to their head in the shape of a gun, and whisper "Chu-chooooo" slowly and quietly.
9. Take a friend of the same sex to a place near a lot of people. Stage a mini lover's quarrel. Scream things such as "You stupid skank! What the hell is wrong with you? Did you f-in think I wasn't gonna catch you?", have you friend grab your shoulder. Slap him/her, and yell "DON'T TOUCH ME!"
Await funny reactions from people.
10. Ask a clerk if she knows where the condoms are. Talk into a dead cell phone saying things such as "Well no, she's shwoing us right now. Okay. Yeah. Well do you want regular or ribbed?" and "How many do you need? Woah! re you having another orgy? Awesome, when? Kay, I'll try to make it. Yep, Sean said he'll show up, too. As long as Paul does."
11. Sing you're rendition of "I will survive" in front of someone. Dance. Ask people if they think you can make it in Hollywood. If they say no, cry. If they say yes, scream "You're lieing! Don't lie!"
12. Put a balloon in your shirt. Ask a cashier where the pickles are. Also where's the ice cream. This works especially well if you're a guy.
13. Stuff 10 Ritz crackers into your mouth. Crunch them up. Cough on people.
14. Organize all the towels in the bathroom aisle by color, size, and country it was made in. Then fold them into origame swans.